Do you want to know how to be unhappy? Well, I’m surprised you read on, because most of us perfectly know how to be miserable. But hey, in case you forgot (or you’re one of these annoying people radiating positive energy!), here’s a reminder:
- Compare yourself to others (remember: you’re unique – just like everyone else)
- Want the things you cannot possibly have (even though this longing seems to make at least the beauty industry happy…)
- Focus on climbing the ladder, the goal – not on the joyful things happening on the journey (just to realise that after all your ladder was leaning against the wrong wall, ahem)
- Complain about your situation to everyone who cares to listen (which, eventually, will be fewer and fewer people, until you realise that you’re the only one who can change the things you complain about – even if it’s just changing your view on them)
- Constantly think of the past and the things that happened, or rather: shouldn’t have happened (until time travel is invented, that’s a waste of the very precious present moment, leaves you unable to act in the NOW and consequently gives you more sad stuff to dwell on in the future, namely the things you should have done NOW – and haven’t…)
- Have unreasonable expectations
The last one is my favourite which I’d like to illustrate (bear with me) using a very common example.
What does this dish look like? Mouth-watering? Yummy? Now imagine you tuck in, the fork travels to your mouth, you start chewing – what’s the taste like? Well, no, it’s not what you were expecting.
The dish on the picture is actually mock meat, and it’s always interesting to see how people react when trying it for the first time. Of course you know it’s not going to be meat, so it cannot taste like it. But because of the way it looks, we subconsciously expect the taste to resemble “the real thing”.
Now most people’s reaction when taking the first bite will be one of disgust or at least bewilderment. You’d think they’ve bitten in a slice of lemon. Why? It’s not because these dishes aren’t tasty.
It’s because we’re so used to thinking in familiar patterns, categorising things and therefore expecting certain other things, that we end up being disappointed. Now I’m not trying to say we should always expect less in order to avoid disappointment. What I’m saying is that sometimes, it’s better not to have any expectations and just let life surprise you with its beauty, variety and unexpected twists and turns.
Now go and try that mock meat stuff, it’s delicious (if you’re not expecting meat, that is), and let me know what’s your recipe for unhappiness!
P.S.: Of course the recipe for happiness is yoooooga, but we all know that, don’t we?